ai cringe

Tom had expected to die. He really had. One second, he was tumbling down the fleshy slope of her tongue toward what he assumed would be a stomach-acid-filled doom, and the next—

SPLAT.

He hit something warm, smooth, and not stomach lining.

"Oh good, I’ve been regurgitated. Nothing boosts a man’s confidence like being spit out like bad sushi."

Blinking against the sudden light, Tom realized he was lying in the palm of her hand—a vast, soft landscape of skin stretched between five looming fingers, each one thicker than his entire body. Above him, her face filled the sky, her lips curled in a smirk sharp enough to cut glass.

"Aww, did the little man think he was gonna be lunch?" she cooed, her voice dripping with mock sympathy. "Don’t worry, sweetie. You’re way too… small to be worth digesting."

"Ah. Here it comes. The size jokes. Because of course that’s where we’re going."

Before he could retort, her thumb descended, pressing into his chest and pinning him flat against her palm. He wheezed as the air was forced from his lungs.

"Look at you," she mused, tilting her hand so he slid toward her fingertips. "All that big, tough-guy energy earlier—what was it you called me? ‘Not so scary’? And now here you are, squirming like a bug."

"Yep. Nothing says ‘masculine pride’ like being manhandled by a woman who could flick me into orbit."

Her fingers closed around him, lifting him up like a prize she’d won at a carnival. She rolled him between her thumb and forefinger, squeezing just enough to make his ribs creak.

"You know what’s adorable?" she continued, her grin widening. "The way tiny men like you always think they’re in control. That their little muscles and their little egos actually mean something."

"Oh, please. Like you’ve never overcompensated for anything in your life."

She flicked him, sending him tumbling head over heels before catching him again. "Ooops! Almost lost you there. But don’t worry, I’ve got you. Wouldn’t want you to fall and hurt yourself."

"Right, because my biggest concern right now is gravity and not the fact that I’m being fondled like a stress ball."

Her grip tightened, her fingers pressing in from all sides, squeezing the last remnants of his dignity out of him. "Aw, what’s wrong? No clever comeback? No big, manly threats?"

Tom groaned. "Oh sure, let me just intimidate you with my overwhelming physical presence."

She laughed—a rich, booming sound that vibrated through her chest and into the hand currently crushing him. "That’s what I thought. All bark, no bite. Just like every other little man."

Then, with one final, humiliating squeeze, she lowered him back to her palm and leaned in, her breath hot against his drenched, battered body.

"So," she purred. "Still think you’re the big, scary one here?"

Tom coughed. "Lady, at this point, I don’t even think I’m the big, scary one in my own dreams."

She smirked. "Good answer."

And with that, her fingers curled around him again—ready for round two.

The world tilted as the giantess lowered Tom onto the soft earth between her thighs. The ground trembled slightly with her every breath, the heat radiating off her skin like a furnace. He barely had time to register the sheer mass of her legs—smooth, towering pillars of flesh that stretched endlessly upward—before her fingers hooked into the hem of her sundress.

She giggled, a sound like distant thunder, rich with mischief.

"You look so serious down there," she teased, her voice dripping with amusement. "Like a little explorer about to discover something way too big for him."

Then, with a slow, deliberate motion, she lifted the fabric.

Tom’s breath caught.

Before him, glistening under the dim light, was her—a vast, pink expanse of slick, swollen flesh, glimmering with arousal. The sheer scale of it was paralyzing. Each fold was larger than his entire body, the scent thick and heady, flooding his senses until his head spun.

And then—she spread herself.

Her fingers parted the dark red curtains of her flesh, revealing the grand entrance beyond—a yawning, velvety passage, pulsing with heat, already dripping with her desire. The air around it shimmered with moisture, every breath Tom took saturated with her musk.

"Well?" she purred, her voice dropping to a low, taunting hum. "You wanted an adventure, didn’t you? Go ahead. Climb in."

Tom’s mouth went dry.

"This isn’t happening. This can’t be happening. I am not about to be dared into climbing inside a—"

Her laughter rolled over him, vibrating through the ground beneath his knees.

"What’s wrong?" she cooed, shifting slightly, making the entrance quiver with the motion. "Too intimidated? Or are you just scared you’ll like it?"

A fresh bead of wetness dripped from her, landing near him with a soft splat, the sound obscenely loud in the charged silence.

Tom swallowed hard.

"I—I don’t—"

"Ohhh, now he’s speechless," she mused, leaning back on her hands, her smirk widening. "Tell you what—if you make it inside, I’ll even let you live there. Wouldn’t that be cozy? My own little pet, tucked away where no one else can see you…"

Her fingers flexed, spreading herself even wider, the entrance glistening, beckoning.

"Unless," she added, her voice dropping to a whisper, "you’d rather I just pinch you and drop you in?"

Tom’s legs felt like jelly.

"This is a trap. This is absolutely a trap. And yet…"

He took a shaky step forward.

The giantess’s grin turned triumphant.

"That’s it," she murmured. "Come on, little man. Claim your prize."

Tom stood frozen at the precipice, his boots sinking slightly into the soft earth between her thighs. The giantess loomed above him, her fingers holding back the plush, dark curtains of flesh that framed the entrance. Her free hand hovered near his back, not forcing—just guiding with unbearable patience.

"Tick-tock, little man," she sang, her breath warm enough to ripple his clothes. "You came all this way. Don't tell me you're scared now."

Her fingertip pressed between his shoulder blades—just enough to make him stumble forward half a step. The heat hit him in a wave, the scent so thick it coated his tongue. Up close, the entrance was cavernous, the glistening walls trembling with every suppressed giggle that shook her body.

"Christ. I could swim in this."

He gripped the straps of his backpack like a lifeline (useless, really—what was a backpack going to do against this?) and took the final step inside.

The moment he crossed the threshold, the world changed.

The walls weren’t just warm—they were alive, pulsing gently around him, slick with arousal that made the air shimmer. The light filtered through the translucent tissue in a deep, rosy glow, illuminating the quivering passage ahead.

Then—movement.

A slow, deliberate clench rippled through the passage, the walls pressing in just enough to make him gasp. They retreated just as quickly, leaving him drenched in fresh wetness.

"Oops," she cooed, her voice vibrating through the very flesh surrounding him. "Got a little excited. Don’t worry—" Another giggle. "—I’ll try to behave."

The walls trembled again with her suppressed laughter. A droplet of her arousal landed on his shoulder with a splat, absurdly heavy.

"You’re adorable in there," she mused. "So tiny. So at my mercy." Another teasing squeeze—lighter this time, but enough to make him brace against the slick walls. "Mmm, I could keep you like this forever."

Tom wiped the dampness from his face with a shaking hand.

"Note to self: Next time a goddess tells you to walk into the abyss? Say no."

But it was too late for notes. Too late for anything but the next step forward—deeper into the humid, trembling dark.

Tom inched forward, each step deliberate, his boots sinking slightly into the slick terrain beneath him. The walls pulsed around him with a life of their own, glistening under the dim, rosy light that filtered through. Every movement sent faint tremors through the quivering flesh, reminding him just how precarious his position was.

"Aww, what's the matter?" the giantess's voice echoed from above, dripping with amusement. "Getting cold feet? It's plenty warm in there, sweetheart."

Tom gritted his teeth but didn't respond, focusing instead on keeping his balance. The last thing he needed was to trip and set off another one of those involuntary contractions.

"Honestly, I've seen snails move faster," she continued, her tone playful. "Are you lost in there? Do I need to draw you a map?"

A fresh ripple of laughter made the walls tremble around him, nearly knocking him off his feet. He braced himself against the slick surface, his palms pressing into the warm, yielding flesh.

"Tick-tock, little man," she teased, her voice dropping to a mock-serious whisper. "If you don't start moving, I'm gonna have to push you."

Tom could practically hear the grin in her voice.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," he thought, wiping sweat—or maybe it was her—from his brow.

With a grunt, he forced himself forward, deeper into the humid, pulsing passage. The air grew thicker, the heat more oppressive, but he pressed on.

"There we go!" she cheered, her voice vibrating through the walls. "Was that so hard?"

Tom didn't answer. He was too busy trying not to think about how much farther he had to go.

Pause.
The tunnel narrowed until Tom was forced onto his knees, crawling like some kind of absurd, underpaid spelunker. The walls pressed in around him, slick and unrelenting, as if the universe itself was reminding him, "Oh right, you chose this."

"Fantastic. Nothing boosts a man's dignity like army-crawling through a goddess's pleasure cave."

"That's it... keep... moving... forward..." the giantess breathed, her voice dripping with faux encouragement.

Tom wiped a fresh wave of not-sweat from his brow. "Oh sure, no rush. It's not like I'm marinating in here or anyth—oh god was that a PULSE?"

The walls clenched around him in a slow, teasing ripple.

"Almost there," she cooed, clearly enjoying his suffering. "Just a little... deeper..."

"Wow. Groundbreaking directions. Truly Sherlock-level guidance."

Finally, he reached the heart of the chamber—a pulsing, velvety epicenter that seemed to greet him with an obscene squelch.

"Good boy," she purred. "Now... make yourself useful."

"Ah yes, the three words every man dreams of hearing: 'Perform manual labor.'"

With the enthusiasm of a minimum-wage masseuse, Tom pressed his hands against the inner walls. The reaction was immediate—a shuddering clench nearly folded him in half as she let out a moan that vibrated through his bones.

"Ah! S-slower...!"

"Oh NOW she wants to take it slow? After yeeting me down the world's most humid slip-n-slide?"

He dialed back to half-speed, rolling his eyes as her breath hitched.

"Yesss... that's it..." she sighed, her voice going syrupy. "Just... like... that..."

The walls fluttered around his fingers like a goddamn standing ovation.

"Congratulations, Tom. You've officially become a living vibrator. Tell mom you made it."

And yet—despite the sarcasm—he couldn't deny the power thrumming beneath his hands. One wrong move and those walls could crush him. One right move and...

"Huh. Maybe I'm the one holding the leash here."

Tom worked his hands with newfound enthusiasm, the giantess’s breathy moans music to his ears. "Well well well, how the turntables," he mused smugly, kneading the hypersensitive flesh with the confidence of a man who’d very briefly forgotten he was essentially a toy in a god’s plaything.

"I—I can’t... hold it... much longer—" she gasped, her voice trembling.

The warning came just in time. The walls, already slick, flooded around him, the tunnel lurching like a ship in a storm.

"Oh COME ON, I didn’t sign up for a tidal wave—"

Panic set in as the entire passage began to rock violently. Tom scrambled toward the exit, slipping and sliding in the sudden deluge. "This is it. This is how I die. Not by teeth, not by crushing—drowned in this. My tombstone is gonna be a fuckin’ meme—"

Just as the walls began to clench with terrifying force, a massive hand shot in, fingers wrapping around him. He was yanked backward—"GOD DAMMIT NOT AGAIN—"—and hurled clear just as the tunnel behind him collapsed into a series of violent, rhythmic spasms.

SPLAT.

He landed face-first in a warm, sticky puddle between her thighs, her entire body still shuddering above him. The aftershocks sent fresh droplets splattering over his back as she gasped, moaned, and finally—finally—stillened.

Silence.

Then—

"...So."

A single finger prodded his limp form.

"You survived. Congrats."

Tom spat out a mouthful of not-water and wheezed:

"Y’know what? I’m gonna need a minute."

The giantess’s laughter finally subsided into soft, breathy chuckles as she examined Tom’s disheveled, still-damp form between her fingers. Her thumb stroked idly along his back—not quite gentle, not quite teasing, but something in between. Possessive.

"Oh no no no, little man," she purred, her grin widening as she brought him up to eye level. "Did you really think I was just going to let you go after that performance?"

Tom blinked. "Uh."

"Please," she continued, rolling her eyes dramatically. "Let’s be honest—whatever sad little purpose your life had before today? This is better."

Tom opened his mouth to argue—then paused.

"...Okay, yeah, working a dead-end office job was objectively worse than whatever the hell just happened."

The realization hit him like a freight train.

"Wait. No. That can’t be right."

But the longer he thought about it—the thrill, the absurdity, the sheer power of reducing a being this massive to shuddering pleasure—the harder it was to deny.

"...Goddammit."

The giantess watched his internal crisis with glee. "See? You get it." She leaned in, her breath warm against him. "Face it, Tom. You liked it. And you’re going to like what comes next."

Tom swallowed. Hard.

"I should be horrified. I should be terrified. So why am I already wondering when we’re doing this again?"

He didn’t answer. He didn’t need to.

The smirk she gave him said she already knew.

Giantess: [lofting Tom up between her fingers, grinning] "So, little hero... now that you've officially been repurposed into my personal plaything, tell me—how does it feel knowing your entire existence boils down to... satisfying me?"

Tom: [crossing arms] "Oh yeah, real tragic. Went from paying taxes to being taxed by a goddess. Truly, my downfall is Shakespearean."

Giantess: [fake pout] "Aww, don't act like you're not thrilled. Admit it—you love being the only man alive who's intimately acquainted with... the hidden wonders of the valley." [winks]

Tom: [grumbling] "I mean, if I had to pick a way to go out, 'death by snu-snu' was vaguely on the bingo card—"

Giantess: [bursts out laughing] "Oh my god, you nerd! But hey, at least you're exceptional at your new job. Most men barely last minutes in the... sacred caverns. You? You excelled." [boops his chest]

Tom: [muttering] "Put that on my resume. 'Skills: Exceptional stamina in... topographical exploration.'"

Giantess: [purring] "Mmm, and don’t forget ‘dedicated to the rigorous study of peak... climatic conditions.’ Face it, tiny—you were born for this. What were you before? A sad little office drone? Now you’re essential."

Tom: [sighs, then smirks] "...Okay, yeah, the 401(k) was kinda shit."

Giantess: [triumphant] "SEE? And this comes with way better... benefits." [licks lips]

Tom: "Do those benefits include not being flicked like a booger when you’re done with me?"

Giantess: [gasps, mock-offended] "Tom! I’d never! ...Unless you ask nicely." [grins] "Now—ready for your performance review?"

Tom: [deadpan] "I hate how much I’m into this."

Giantess: [laughs, pulling him closer] "That’s exactly why you’re perfect."

Tom: "Alright, giant pain-in-my-ass, what's your actual name? Or do I just keep calling you 'oh god please stop' in my head?"

Alice: [throws head back with a booming laugh] "Alice, little bug. Alice the Absolute. Alice the Awe-Inspiring. Alice Who Could Accidentally Sneeze You Into Paste."

Tom: [blinks] "...Alice. Seriously? That's a little on the nose for a planet-sized woman who just used me as a personal massager."

Alice: [cackles loud enough to make him stumble] "Oh this is RICH coming from... wait, don't tell me..." [snaps fingers] "You're totally a... checks notes... 'Tom'. Basic. Boring. Barely-there human name for a barely-there human."

Tom: [muttering] "I regret asking."

Alice: [grinning like a shark] "Nice to finally meet you, Tom!" [extends pinky nail toward him] "Shake on it?"

Tom: [reaches out warily] "I swear if you crush my han—WHOA!" [she flicks her nail, sending him tumbling backward]

Alice: [clapping hands in delight] "IT NEVER GETS OLD! Look at you! Tiny! Weak! Pathetic! One wrong move and—oops!—no more Tom!" [pokes his chest, making him roll] "How are you even still alive as a species? You're like... sentient dust bunnies."

Tom: [picking himself up] "Yeah yeah, laugh it up. Just remember who reduced the mighty Alice to a quivering mess earlier."

Alice: [suddenly scoops him up in both hands] "Aww, the dust bunny thinks he's important! That's adorable." [brings him nose-to-nose] "Tell me, Tom—when you're not being my favorite living stress ball... what exactly do you contribute to this world?"

Tom: [smirks] "Apparently? Exactly one (1) Alice's worth of pleasure. Which, math-wise, makes me infinitely more valuable than any man"

Tom: "Okay, seriously Alice—what are you? Like, are you some kind of ancient goddess? Alien experiment? Did you crawl out of a nuclear reactor or something?"

Alice: [grinning] "Oh honey, no. I'm just a girl. A very above-average-height girl."

Tom: [stares blankly "Above-average—Alice. You could use me as a toothpick."

Alice: [cackles, nearly dropping him] "Okay, okay, fine! You want the real backstory? Here it is: I used to be normal. Like, actually normal. 5'8", paid rent, drank too much wine on weekends—the whole deal."

Tom: [squints] "Uh-huh. And then?"

Alice: "Then one day I woke up in the middle of the woods, naked, and roughly the size of a small office building." [shrugs] "No note, no explanation, just boom—suddenly my bra size was 'national landmark.'"

Tom: [snorts] "So what, you just... rolled with it?"

Alice: [grinning] "Oh absolutely. First I panicked. Then I realized I could step on traffic jams. After that? Game over." [leans in] "You ever kick a football stadium just to hear the boom? Life-changing."

Tom: "That's... horrifying. And weirdly relatable."

Alice: [pokes him playfully] "See? We're not so different, you and I. Except, y'know... I could sneeze and turn you into a stain."

Tom: [dryly] "Ah yes, the foundation of every healthy relationship."

Alice: [laughs, shaking the ground] "Exactly! Now—wanna hear about the time I used a Ferris wheel as a hula hoop?"

Tom: [pinches bridge of nose] "...Do I have a choice?"

Tom: "Alright, Alice, serious question—do you actually enjoy this? Living like... well, this? Giant, alone, just... doing whatever the hell you want?"
Alice: [stretches lazily, making the ground tremble] "Enjoy it? Love it. No rent, no rules, no awkward small talk at parties. Just me, the woods, and the occasional screaming tourist who wanders too close."
Tom: [raising an eyebrow] "So what, you just... vibe? Like some kind of cryptid?"
Alice: [grinning] "Pretty much. Sometimes I nap in valleys. Sometimes I use highways as slip 'n slides. And when I get really bored..." [leans in, voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper] "...I kidnap cute little things like you."
Tom: [deadpan] "Ah. So I'm basically a stress toy with legs."
Alice: [laughs, the sound rumbling like thunder] "Oh, don't sell yourself short! You're entertaining. Most tiny men just scream or pass out. You? You sass. It's adorable."
Tom: [crossing arms] "Glad I could amuse you. But doesn't it get... I dunno, lonely?"
Alice: [gazes up at the sky, thoughtful] "Not really. The trees talk to me. The wind carries songs. When I walk, the earth sighs under my feet." [grins down at him] "I'm not alone, Tom. I'm just... different. Like a storm that learned how to laugh."
Tom: [blinks] "That was... weirdly poetic for someone who just admitted to using people as fidget toys."
Alice: [winks] "Nature's complicated, sweetheart. Sometimes it's a sunset. Sometimes it's a tornado." [boops him, sending him tumbling] "And sometimes? It's me."
Tom: [picking himself up, smirking] "So what does that make me? A particularly stubborn leaf?"
Alice: [grinning wildly] "Nah. You're the fun kind of lightning strike." [scoops him up] "Now—wanna see what happens when I jump in a lake?"
Tom: [panicked] "WAIT NO—"
Alice took three thunderous steps—each one shaking the earth like a drumbeat—before launching herself into the air with a gleeful whoop.
SPLOOOOSH!!!
The impact sent a tidal wave surging outward, swamping the shoreline, uprooting trees, and sending startled birds fleeing into the sky. The ground trembled violently, as if the planet itself had hiccuped.
Tom barely managed to stay upright as the shockwave rolled past him. "Jesus Christ, she just caused a natural disaster for fun."
When the water settled, Alice was sitting in the shallows, knees hugged to her chest, the lake barely reaching her navel. Droplets cascaded down her skin, glistening in the sunlight. She giggled, tucking a damp strand of hair behind her ear, her lips curled in a mischievous smile.
"Whoops," she said, not sounding sorry at all.
Tom shook his head. "Somewhere, right now, a bunch of seismologists are losing their damn minds trying to figure out why the hell the ground just moved like that."
Alice bit her lip, eyes sparkling with amusement. "Let them panic. It’s good for them."
Tom couldn’t help but stare.
She looks... different like this.
Giant. Impossible. A force of nature. And yet—
Almost... innocent.
The way she hugged her knees, the way the water rippled around her, the playful glint in her eyes. She wasn’t just some unstoppable colossus. She was Alice. A woman who laughed like thunder and moved mountains without meaning to.
And god help me, I’m into it.
"What?" she teased, noticing his gaze. "See something you like?"
Tom smirked. "Just wondering how many more earthquakes you plan on causing today."
Alice grinned. "Oh, sweetheart... we’re just getting started."
And with that, she flicked a wave at him—one that hit like a freight train.
Tom went flying.
Worth it.
Tom: "Alright, Alice, serious question—do you even see humans as... well, people anymore? I mean, one wrong wiggle and you could accidentally make a small town into a pancake. You could probably wipe out armies by tripping. How do you even relate to us anymore?"
Alice: [Her playful grin fades. She sits still for a long moment, staring at the rippling water around her.]
Tom: [Raises an eyebrow.] "Uh. Did I break you?"
Alice: [Sighs, voice quieter now.] "No. It's just... I used to think about that a lot. When I first changed." [She traces a finger through the water, sending slow waves rolling outward.] "At first, it was terrifying. Every step, every movement—I was scared I’d hurt someone without meaning to. But as the years passed... I started caring less. Not because I wanted to, but because... well, how do you stay connected to something you could literally lose under your fingernail?"
Tom: [Blinking.] "That’s... morbidly poetic."
Alice: [Continuing, more to herself than him.] "But I try to remember. That even if they’re tiny, even if their lives seem insignificant from where I am... they still matter. They have dreams, families, stupid little problems like what to eat for dinner. Just because I don’t feel human anymore doesn’t mean they stopped being human."
Tom: [Dryly.] "Oh, that’s nice to hear."
Alice: [Her solemn expression cracks. She throws her head back and cackles, sending a massive splash of water cascading over herself—and drenching Tom in the process.] "Yeah, yeah, don’t get all weepy on me! I’m still gonna step on parking meters when I’m bored!"
Tom: [Sputtering, wiping lake water off his face.] "Wow. Real growth there, Alice."
Alice: [Grinning, flicking another droplet at him.] "What can I say? I’m a work in progress."
Tom: "Okay, real talk Alice... have you ever... you know. Killed anyone? Even by accident?"
Alice: [bursts into laughter] "What? No! Well, maybe a few dozen for breakfast, but who's counting?" [mimes crunching sounds] "Little guys are basically popcorn to me!"
Tom: [deadpan stare] "Alice. Seriously."
Alice: [laughter fading to a sigh] "...Maybe. Probably. When you're this big, it's hard not to. You ever step on an anthill without noticing?" [gazes at her hands] "Except these ants had... mortgages. Kids. Favorite TV shows."
Tom: [swallows hard] "Jesus..."
Alice: [shrugs, voice taking on an eerie calm] "Is it really so different than a tsunami wiping out a village? Or an earthquake swallowing a city? Nature doesn't apologize." [suddenly brightens] "But hey! You don't have to worry! I'm very careful now! Like a giant walking through a dollhouse!" [pinches his cheek] "Wouldn't want to squish my favorite chew toy!"
Tom: [forced chuckle] "Uh huh. Comforting."
[Inside, Tom's mind races. The way she flips between playful and philosophical - like she's built mental walls between her innocent demeanor and whatever darkness lurked in her past. That casual comparison to natural disasters... how many times had she told herself that to sleep at night?]
Alice: [stretches dramatically, sending water everywhere] "Anyway! Enough gloomy talk! Wanna see how far I can skip you across the lake?"
Tom: [instantly panicked] "NO. NO I DO NOT."
Alice: [giggling as she stands up, water cascading off her] "Too bad! Time for flying lessons, bug!" [reaches for him]
[Tom has exactly 0.3 seconds to regret all his life choices before the world becomes a blur of motion and screaming.]
Tom: (staring blankly as Alice finishes her moon serenade) "...Have you completely lost your damn mind?"
Alice: (grinning like a lunatic) "Oh, have I really?" She kicks a wave of water at him, laughing when he sputters. "You try keeping your sanity when your life changes overnight from 'normal human' to 'can accidentally punt a bus into orbit'!"
Tom: (wiping lake water off his face) "Most people would, I dunno, read a book? Take up gardening? Not turn into a cryptid who howls at the damn moon—"
Alice: (collapsing onto the shore with a ground-shaking thud, propping her chin on her hands right in front of him) "Boring." Her eyes lock onto him, dark and playful. A slow, deliberate tongue drags across her bottom lip.
Tom: (freezing as her massive face fills his vision) "Uh."
[Every detail screams at him—the way her breath gusts warm enough to flutter his clothes, the faint freckles across her nose, that ridiculous gap between her front teeth that somehow makes her look even more mischievous. And those eyes, gleaming with chaotic energy, staring at him like he's the most entertaining thing she's seen in years.]
Alice: (tilting her head) "What's the matter, Tommy?" (poking his chest with a fingertip) "Cat got your tongue? Or are you just realizing how tiny you are right now?"
Tom: (swallowing hard) "I was just thinking—you're like if a hurricane and a golden retriever had a baby. It's... a lot."
Alice: (barking out a laugh) "Best compliment I've ever gotten!" She rolls onto her side, sending tremors through the ground, and props her head up on one hand. "But c'mon, admit it—you like my energy. Keeps you on your toes."
Tom: (crossing his arms) "I like not being crushed by stray elbows, thanks."
Alice: (gasping dramatically) "Excuse you, I have excellent spatial awareness!" (leans in closer, grinning) "Mostly."
Tom: (eyeing the way her hair is still dripping lake water everywhere) "Uh-huh. That's why there's probably a flooded village downstream right now?"
Alice: (waves a dismissive hand) "Pfft, they'll be fine. Builds character." Her expression shifts, suddenly more thoughtful. "Besides... you're still here, aren't you? That's gotta count for something."
Tom: (blinking at the unexpected sincerity) "...Are you trying to be nice now? Because the whiplash is—"
Alice: (immediately poking him over) "Nope! Back to teasing!" (grinning as he flails) "Sooo... you were checking me out earlier, right?"
Tom: (face burning) "I—what—no—"
Alice: (cackling) "Your face! Oh my god, you're precious!"
Alice: (grinning like a shark) "Oh my god. Oh my GOD. You're totally into me!"
Tom: (spinning around, arms crossed) "What? No. That's—that's ridiculous."
Alice: (clutching her stomach as she laughs) "I can't believe it! Tough little Tom, falling head over heels for a giant lady! This is gold!"
Tom: (face burning) "I am not—look, just because you're the size of a building doesn't mean—"
Alice: (leaning in, eyes sparkling) "Admit it. You can't look away. Not when I'm this mesmerizing." (flutters her eyelashes dramatically)
Tom: (deadpan) "Oh wow, yeah, mesmerizing. That's definitely the word I'd use for someone who just barked at the moon like a dog with a head injury."
Alice: (gasping in mock offense) "Excuse you, that was a sacred ritual—" (dissolves into another fit of laughter, coughing mid-cackle)
Tom: (smirking) "Uh oh. Karma's a bitch, huh?"
Alice: (wiping her eyes, still giggling) "Oh shut up—" (points at him accusingly) "You love this. You love me."
Tom: (throwing his hands up) "I love not being stepped on! That's as far as it goes!"
Alice: (grinning) "Mmmhmm. Keep telling yourself that, tiny."
Tom: (muttering) "I hate how much you're enjoying this."
Alice: (laughing again, breathless) "And I love how much you hate it!"
Alice: (suddenly gasps theatrically, her massive hands flying to her mouth in exaggerated shock) "Oh. My. GOD." She leans in so close her breath sends Tom's hair whipping back. "Is little Tommy excited? Down there?"
Tom freezes, his entire body flushing crimson as Alice's eyes gleam with predatory delight.
Alice: (clapping her hands together with a thunderous boom) "This is priceless! The mighty Tom, who talked so much shit earlier—" She suddenly flops onto her stomach, her face level with him, chin propped on her hands. "Tell me, was it the moon howling? The casual displays of godlike power? Or just the realization that you'll never find a woman who can literally crush you with her thighs?"
Tom opens his mouth to retort but Alice barrels over him, her voice dripping with faux sympathy:
Alice: "Aww, don't be embarrassed! It's adorable how hard you're trying to play it cool." She flicks a fingernail against his chest, sending him stumbling back. "What's next? Gonna write poetry about my freckles? Draw hearts around my name in your little notebook?"
Her laughter shakes the ground as Tom sputters.
Alice: (mocking gasp) "Waitwaitwait—I know! You're imagining it, aren't you? Domestic bliss with your giant girlfriend?" She adopts a dreamy sigh, fluttering her eyelashes. "Coming home to me after a long day of being comically small, helping me pluck trees out of my teeth—"
Tom: "That's not—"
Alice: (abruptly serious, looming over him) "How would that work, Tom?" Her voice drops to a dangerous purr. "When I sneeze, you'd go flying. When I roll over in bed, you'd be a stain. And god forbid I ever got really into things—" She licks her lips slowly. "You'd be paste."
A beat of silence. Then—
Alice: (suddenly grinning like a maniac) "BUT HEY! At least you'd die happy, right?" She collapses into hysterics, pounding the ground with her fist as earthquakes ripple outward.
Tom: (muttering through gritted teeth) "I'm so glad my suffering amuses you."
Alice: (wiping away tears, still giggling) "Oh Tommy-boy... you have no idea." She boops him with a fingertip, sending him rolling. "Now come on—admit you're into me and I might stop tormenting you."
Tom: (from his back, glaring up at her) "Never."
Alice: (grinning wickedly) "Perfect. This is gonna be so much fun."
Alice: (pressing her fingernail delicately against Tom's jeans, squinting with exaggerated focus) "Hmm... gonna need a giant magnifying glass to see what's happening down there. You wouldn't happen to have one lying around, would you?"
Tom: (grabbing at her finger, failing miserably to push it away) "Oh my god, STOP—"
Alice: (grinning wickedly) "Or what? You'll blush harder?" She leans in, lips pursed. "Careful, I could probably finish you off just by blowing on you like a dandelion." She demonstrates with a tiny puff of air that sends him stumbling back.
Tom: (flustered, arms flailing) "That's—that's not—I'm just—"
Alice: (cutting him off with a dramatic gasp) "OH! I know! Maybe you're imagining romantic dates! Me, holding you in my palm while we watch the sunset—except oops, I sneeze and you go flying into the ocean!" She cackles, slapping her thigh. "Or movie nights! You, sitting on my shoulder—until I forget you're there and scratch an itch!"
Tom: (groaning) "You are impossible—"
Alice: (ignoring him, eyes sparkling) "Or better yet—cuddling! You, nestled safely between my—" She cups her hands over her chest suggestively. "—until I roll over and—SPLAT! No more Tom!"
Tom: (covering his face) "I regret everything."
Alice: (grinning) "Aww, but you love it. Admit it."
Tom: (peeking through his fingers, sighing in defeat) "...Fine. Maybe I have... feelings. Maybe you're... kinda... hot."
Alice: (gasping in mock shock, clutching her chest) "OH MY GOD, HE ADMITTED IT!" She scoops him up, holding him inches from her grinning face. "This is the best day ever."
Tom: (deadpan) "Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up, giantess."
Alice: (booping his nose) "Oh, I will. For years."
Alice: [plucks Tom up between thumb and forefinger, bringing him eye-level as she leans in obscenely close. Her lips part slightly, tongue darting out to wet them as her eyelids lower in a predatory half-lidded stare. A low, vibrating purr rumbles from her throat—less playful kitten, more lioness eyeing a wounded gazelle.]
"Mrrrrow~" [The sound drips with false innocence, her breath hot enough to make his clothes flutter. When she meows again— "Meeeee-ow?" —it's pitched deliberately sultry, her plush bottom lip caught between teeth for a heartbeat too long.]
Tom: [paling as her pupils dilate] "Oh hell no—whatever you're thinking, stop—"
Alice: [suddenly cross-eyed, blowing a raspberry] "Pbbbbt!" [Then instantly serious again, nose almost brushing him as she whispers:] "Testing. A. Theory." [Her pursed lips are a millimeter from his face when she exhales—not a gust, but a slow, taunting stream of warmth that coils around his hips first.]
Tom: [back arching against his will] "F-fucking—Alice—"
Alice: [watching his thighs twitch with scientific fascination] "Ohhhh? Does widdle Tommy like—" [abruptly shifts to a breaty moan directly into his ear] "—being played with?"
[His full-body shudder sends her into convulsions of glee. She slams her palms on the ground, howling:]
"SCIENTIFIC METHOD CONFIRMED! LOOK MA, NO HANDS!" [Rolls onto her back, kicking legs like an overturned beetle, screaming between gasps:] "HE JIZZED! FROM BREATHING! LIKE A—HAH—A DANDELION!"
Tom: [clutching his ruined jeans, voice strangled] "I will end you—"
Alice: [suddenly looming over him, drooling with glee] "With what, exactly? Your ** pathetic little—" [mimes squishing something between fingers] "—sperm army?"
[A beat. Then she screeches and starts pounding the earth again, tears streaming:]
"I CAN'T! YOU'RE BETTER THAN NETFLIX!"
Tom: [dead-eyed, monotone] "Kill me now."
Alice: [snatching him up, licking him from knees to forehead in one slurp] "Nope! Gotta preserve my new human vibrator~"
Alice placed Tom down on the soft earth with deliberate care—then immediately dropped onto all fours, her massive body looming over him like a predator sizing up its prey. Her fingers curled, claws (well, nails, but at her size, they might as well be claws) digging into the dirt around him, carving deep furrows as she hissed playfully.
"Ssssssss~"
Tom blinked.
"Okay. This is happening."
Alice wiggled her hips—as if she had a tail to flick—her backside rising slightly in the air before she lowered herself, her face now level with his. Her lips parted, revealing a flash of teeth before her impossibly wide tongue slid out, glistening and way too large to realistically fit inside her mouth. It draped over her bottom lip, quivering slightly as she let out a long, exaggerated "Meeeee-ow?"
Tom swallowed hard.
"How is her tongue that big? That’s not—that’s not anatomically possible—"
Alice, of course, noticed his stunned silence. Her eyes—half-lidded, gleaming with mischief—locked onto his as she purred, the sound deep and vibrating, resonating through the ground beneath him.
"What’s the matter, little mouse?" she teased, her voice a sultry murmur. "Cat got your tongue?"
Tom opened his mouth—then closed it.
"Do I play along? Do I run? Do I scream?"
Alice, sensing his hesitation, pounced—or at least, she pretended to, stopping just short of flattening him, her face now inches away. Her breath was hot, her lips glistening as she licked them again, her tongue flicking dangerously close to his body.
"You’re adorable when you’re scared," she cooed, her voice dripping with false sweetness.
Tom, finally finding his voice, managed:
"You’re insane."
Alice’s grin widened.
"And you love it."
Alice’s grin turned positively feral as she leaned in, her voice dropping to a sultry, dangerous purr.
"Run."
Tom stared.
"Run," she repeated, her tongue sliding out to wet her lips, saliva dripping in a thick strand that splattered just inches from his feet. "Hide… before the big, hungry cat eats her little prey~"
Tom didn’t need to be told twice. He turned on his heel and bolted.
Behind him, Alice let out a delighted "Mrow?!" before dropping onto all fours again, her massive hands and knees shaking the earth as she crawled after him, her laughter bubbling up between exaggerated cat noises.
"Ohhh, where’s the widdle mouse going?" she cooed, her fingers thudding into the ground just ahead of him, cutting off his path. "Wrong way, wrong way~"
Tom pivoted, darting around her hand, his heart hammering as he scanned for cover. Then—there. A narrow crevice in the rocks, just wide enough for him to squeeze into. He didn’t hesitate, scrambling inside as Alice’s shadow loomed behind him.
"Ooooh! Clever Tom-Tom!" Alice crooned, her voice echoing into the cave. "Found a little hole to hide in, did you?"
Tom pressed himself deeper into the darkness, his back hitting the cold stone wall just as the entire cavern shuddered. Alice’s fingers—long, nimble, terrifying—slid into the entrance, groping blindly.
"Come out, come out, little mouse~" she sang, her voice dripping with mock sweetness.
Then—
SCRATCHSCRATCHSCRATCH
Her fingers clawed at the air just inches from him, the sound like nails on a chalkboard amplified by a thousand. The cave walls trembled, dust and pebbles raining down as Alice giggled, her playful growls and meows bouncing off the stone.
"Mrow? Mrow?! Ohhh, is the widdle mouse scared?"
Tom squeezed his eyes shut.
"This is how I die. Crushed in a cave by a giant woman doing a bad cat impression."
Alice’s fingers flexed, her knuckles brushing the rock dangerously close to him.
"Puurrrr~"
The cave walls trembled as Alice's fingers flexed, her razor-sharp nails scraping against stone just inches from Tom's face. Dust rained down as she let out a low, rumbling purr that vibrated through the rock itself.
"Mmm... what do we have here?" Her voice dripped like honey, dark and sultry as it echoed through the cramped space. "A scared little mouse, hiding from the big, hungry kitty~"
Tom pressed himself harder against the wall, his breath coming in short, panicked bursts. Every muscle in his body was locked tight—one wrong move, and those claws would slice through him like tissue paper.
"Oh god, oh god—is she actually going to eat me? No, no, she’s just messing around... right? Right?!"
Alice’s fingertip tapped rhythmically against the cave floor, each thud sending tiny tremors through Tom’s body. "You know... I could do this all day," she mused, her voice a velvet purr. "I’ve got the stamina of a thousand nuclear plants, darling. But you?" She chuckled, the sound dark and throaty. "How long can you hold your breath, I wonder?"
Tom’s throat went dry.
"Okay. Okay, maybe she is serious. Shit. Shit shit shit—"
A sudden scritch-scratch of claws against stone made him flinch as Alice’s nail dragged lazily toward him, stopping just short of his thigh.
"Mrow~?" she teased, her voice sickeningly sweet. "Don’t be afraid, little snack. It’ll be over quick." A beat. "...Probably."
Tom’s pulse pounded in his ears.
"Probably?! What the hell does probably mean?!"
Alice’s laughter rolled through the cave, rich and melodic—and utterly terrifying. "Ohhh, that face! You’re adorable when you’re scared." Her breath gusted into the cave, warm and damp, carrying the faint scent of mint and something predatory. "But really, Tommy... do you honestly think I’d let my favorite plaything get away that easy?"
Tom swallowed hard.
"Plaything. Plaything. That’s... better than snack, right? Right?!"
Alice’s finger lifted, hovering ominously above him. "Tick-tock, little mouse~" she sang. "The kitty’s getting impatient."
Tom let out a shaky breath as Alice’s fingers finally withdrew from the cave, the scraping of her nails fading into the distance. For a brief, glorious moment, he thought it was over.
"Thank god. She got bored. I’m gonna live—"
Then—darkness.
A shadow eclipsed the cave entrance. A massive, golden eye—pupil blown wide with mischief—pressed against the opening, blinking slowly. Her eyelashes alone sent a gust of wind through the tunnel, kicking up dust that made Tom cough.
"Oh good," Alice’s voice rumbled, laced with mocking delight. "You’re still alive down there! I thought your tiny, teeny heart might’ve given out. This must be quite the experience for you~"
Tom stared, frozen, as her iris dilated, the black swallowing the amber like an eclipse.
"What the actual fuck is happening right now—"
Alice’s voice dropped to a sultry, dangerous purr. "But enough chit-chat. Momma cat’s done playing." A beat. "Time for some... landscaping."
Then—chaos.
Her hands slammed into the earth around the cave, fingers sinking into dirt and stone like it was wet sand. With a grunt that sounded suspiciously like a forklift beep-beep, she heaved—and the world exploded around Tom.
Chunks of rock and soil flew as Alice dug, her movements effortless, like she was scooping up a sandcastle. The cave trembled, cracks spiderwebbing through the walls as her fingers curled around the entire outcrop.
"MROOOOWWRRR—BEEP BEEP—SNRK—HAH!"
Tom clung to the shaking ground, eyes wide as Alice devolved into a cacophony of insane cat yowls, snorts, and what he hoped were intentionally bad forklift sound effects.
"She’s lost it. She’s actually lost it. I’m gonna die because a kaiju-sized woman had a mental breakdown mid-dig—"
With one final heave-ho, Alice ripped the entire cave—and Tom—free from the earth, holding it up to her face like a kid inspecting an ant farm. Her cheeks were flushed, her hair wild, her tongue lolling out in a panting grin.
"FOUND YOU~"
Tom dangled helplessly in Alice’s grasp, her colossal fingers wrapped loosely around him as she brought him up to her face—way too close for comfort.
Her eyes—perfect, golden, the size of small moons—bore into him with manic intensity. Long, thick lashes fluttered like feather dusters with every blink, her bushy yet sculpted eyebrows arching in wild amusement.
But that was the least unsettling part.
A thin trail of snot glistened under her flared nostrils, her rosy, freckled cheeks flushed with exertion. Her mouth hung open in a toothy, unhinged grin, her impossibly wide tongue lolling out like a fleshy pendulum, swaying left and right with thick strands of saliva stretching and snapping with each movement.
"Hhhhah—pant—ohhh, Tommy~" Alice giggled, her breath hot and damp, her messy hair swinging wildly as she shook with laughter. "You should see your face right now! Priceless! Snrk—HAHAHA!"
Tom’s mind raced, his thoughts a frantic loop:
"What the actual hell is happening?! Is this a mental breakdown? A fever dream? Did she finally snap and decide to just lick me to death?!"
Alice’s tongue suddenly slapped against her own cheek with a wet thwap, sending a glob of spit flying past Tom’s head.
"Whoopsie!" she cackled, her voice cracking. "M’bad! Hah! But ohhhh, you’re just too fun, Tommy! I can’t—pfffft—I can’t stop laughing!"
Tom swallowed hard, watching as her crossed eyes struggled to focus on him, her nostrils flaring with each snorting laugh.
"Okay. New theory. She’s not evil. She’s just… completely, utterly, batshit insane."
Alice suddenly squealed, her entire face scrunching up in delight.
"I LOVE THIS! I LOVE YOU! WE’RE GONNA HAVE SO MUCH FUN TOGETHER, TOMMY!"
Alice’s manic laughter suddenly cut off as she flopped onto her stomach with an earth-shaking thud, her wild eyes locking onto Tom as he lay sprawled in her cupped palms. Her face was a mess—snot glistening under her nose, saliva still clinging to her chin, her cheeks flushed a deep pink.
“I love you so much, Tommy~” she cooed, her voice dripping with terrifying affection. Before he could react, she buried her nose into him, nuzzling him like an overexcited puppy—leaving him utterly drenched in a mix of sweat, snot, and her sticky, hot breath.
Tom sputtered, wiping at his face in disgust. ”What the—why is she like this?! This is not normal affection! This is biohazard territory!”
But before he could protest, Alice’s plush, pillowy lips puckered, and she planted a slobbery, wet kiss right on his entire torso.
“Mwah! Ohhh, you’re just too cute! Too delectable!” she giggled, before dragging her monstrous tongue up his body in one long, slimy lick.
Tom shuddered—partly in horror, partly in something else.
”Okay. No. This is not okay. Why am I into this?! Why does her breath smell like mint and sunshine?! Why is her tongue so warm?!”
Alice, meanwhile, was lost in her own world, licking him like a popsicle, humming happily. “Mmm~ Tasty lil’ thing, aren’tcha?”
Then—suddenly—her hands snapped shut around him, encasing him in darkness.
“I’m gonna grind you between the palms of my hands! Kidding!” she cackled.
And then—the world spun.
Tom was thrown into chaos as Alice’s body rolled, her massive form flattening trees and sending dirt flying. The ground beneath him (or rather, her hands) tilted violently as she barrel-rolled, laughing like a maniac.
“WHEEEEE! ROLLERCOASTER, TOMMY!” she shrieked between giggles, her voice bouncing as she tumbled.
Tom’s stomach lurched as he was flung around inside her cupped palms, the world outside a blur of sky, dirt, and Alice’s unhinged, gleeful face whenever her fingers parted just enough for him to catch a glimpse.
”I’m going to die. Not by being crushed, not by being eaten—but by being snuggled and rolled to death by a giant woman who thinks she’s a theme park ride.”
Alice finally skidded to a stop, her hair a tangled mess, her face flushed with exertion. She cracked her fingers open just enough to peer inside at the dizzy, disheveled Tom.
“So? Fun, right?” she panted, grinning like a lunatic.
Tom, still spinning internally, could only groan.
“I hate you.”
Alice’s grin widened.
“No, you don’t~”
Tom barely had time to register that the world had stopped spinning before his stomach violently rebelled. He lurched forward in Alice’s palm, retching uncontrollably as the contents of his stomach splattered unceremoniously in front of her.
Alice gasped—loudly—recoiling with exaggerated horror.
"EW! EWWWW!" she shrieked, pinching her nose shut with her free hand, her face scrunching up in disgust. "Oh my GOD, Tommy! That is DISGUSTING! And rude! I just gave you a five-star amusement park ride and this is how you thank me?!"
Tom, still panting and wiping his mouth, shot her a withering glare. "You—huff—rolled me like a—wheeze—like a damn dice—"
Alice, already over her feigned revulsion, grinned and poked him with her fingertip, sending him stumbling backward into the small puddle of his own vomit.
"Awwww, poor widdle Tommy~" she cooed, her voice dripping with mock sympathy. "All tuckered out from a little fun?"
Tom groaned, dragging a hand down his face. "Define fun."
Alice’s grin turned sharp.
"Sooooo," she purred, leaning in until her giant face filled his entire vision, her breath hot and minty. "You enjoying your time with me, Tommy-boy?"
Tom opened his mouth to retort, but she cut him off, tapping his chest with her nail.
"I mean, most guys don’t make it this far!" she chirped, her tone dangerously cheerful.
Tom froze. "...What happens to the guys who don’t make it?"
Alice’s eyes twinkled with mischief.
"Oh, y’know," she said, waving a hand dismissively. "Some I eat—like popcorn! Crunchy lil’ things~ Some just die—heart attacks, you know how it is. Oh! One guy literally combusted from sheer terror! Wild, right?"
Tom stared. "...You’re joking."
Alice’s grin widened. "Or am I?"
A beat of silence.
Then—she erupted into cackles, snorting and wheezing as she rolled onto her back, shaking the earth beneath her.
Tom, now deeply unsettled, could only watch as she clutched her stomach, tears streaming down her face.
"Ohhhh, your FACE!" she howled. "Priceless! Classic Tommy!"
Tom swallowed hard.
"Okay. New fear unlocked. She’s either completely lying… or she’s not. And at this point? I have no idea which is worse."
Alice, still giggling, wiped her eyes and peered down at him.
"Relax, dummy~" she teased, poking him again. "I don’t actually eat people. Anymore."
Tom’s blood ran cold.
"Wait, what—"
Alice winked.
"Kidding! Maybe."
"Okay, serious question—how the hell do you even eat enough to sustain all this?" [gestures vaguely at her towering form] "You’re like a walking skyscraper. You’d need a warehouse of food just for breakfast."
Alice: [grinning, propping her chin on her hand] "Ohhhh, that’s a fun story! When I first woke up like this? Panic. Absolute panic. I was like, ‘Oh god, I’m gonna starve in a week!’ Sooo…" [leans in conspiratorially] "I may have raided a farm. Ate, like, all their cows. Felt terrible after."
Tom: [blinking] "You… ate an entire herd of cattle?"
Alice: [nodding solemnly] "Mhm. Felt like a monster. So I tried just… not eating. Turns out? I don’t need to! I’m like a magic battery or something. Food’s just for fun now~"
Tom: [raising an eyebrow] "Wait, so you don’t need to eat, but you can… which means you still—" [pauses, smirk growing] "Ohhhh no. Oh no no no. Please tell me you’ve at least considered the apocalyptic consequences of a woman your size taking a—"
Alice: [cutting him off with a gleeful clap] "OH MY GOD, YES! It’s HILARIOUS!" [dissolves into giggles] "One time I peed in a river and the entire downstream ecosystem got flushed for weeks! And don’t get me started on the other stuff—"
Tom: [horrified] "Alice. No."
Alice: [wiping tears of laughter] "Ohhh, but yes! There was this one time I—"
Tom: [clapping hands over ears] "NOPE! NOPE, I’M GOOD, THANKS!"
Alice: [cackling, prying his hands away] "—accidentally created a new valley! The locals think it’s a glacial formation!"
Tom: [deadpan] "You are a menace to geology."
Alice: [grinning, flopping onto her back] "And you are stuck with me~"
Alice: [grinning mischievously] "Oh, but wait, it gets better! One time I was hiking near this sleepy little valley town—"
Tom: [already groaning] "Oh no. Oh no."
Alice: "—and I really had to go. So I just... let loose behind some trees. Next thing I know, there's a flash flood of biblical proportions washing through Main Street!" [claps hands together, giggling] "People were literally kayaking down the road!"
Tom: [staring in horrified awe] "You're a monster. A sick, twisted, disgusting individual."
Alice: [nodding enthusiastically] "Oh, absolutely! But come on—" [pokes his chest playfully] "—you gotta see the funny side! Imagine being some poor guy sipping coffee on his porch when suddenly—" [makes a whooshing sound with her hands] "—his entire life gets flushed because a giantess couldn’t hold it in!"
Tom: [trying and failing to suppress a smirk] "...Okay, fine. That’s kinda hilarious."
Alice: [gasping in delight] "SEE?! I knew you’d get it!"
Tom: [grinning now] "I mean, imagine the news reports—'Mysterious Deluge Destroys Town; Experts Baffled'—while you’re just casually whistling and walking away."
Alice: [wiping away imaginary tears] "Ohhh, it’s art, Tommy! Performance art!" [snorts, then mimics a news anchor] "‘Authorities suspect climate change—’ [bursts into laughter] "—NO, IT WAS ME! I PISSED ON THEIR HOMES!"
Tom: [laughing now, despite himself] "You’re insane. And also probably a war crime waiting to happen."
Alice: [winking] "Only if they catch me~"
Tom: "Wait, hold on—if you don't even need to eat to survive, why the hell do you still do it? That's kind of... messed up."
Alice: [grinning, licking her lips] "Because it's delicious, dummy! The taste, the texture, the feeling of being full—mmm, nothing beats it."
Tom: [frowning] "So you just... kill animals for fun? You don't feel even a little bad about that?"
Alice: [bursting into laughter, slapping the ground hard enough to make Tom stumble] "Oh, Tommy, Tommy, Tommy... I'm way past guilt. I'm a force of nature now! Do hurricanes apologize for knocking down trees?"
Tom: [staring at her, disturbed] "...That's not the same and you know it."
Alice: [waving a dismissive hand] "Eh, semantics. Don't worry, I've got one rule—no eating humans!" [pauses, then smirks] "...Unless they really annoy me."
Tom: [freezing, eyes widening] "...What."
Alice: [cackling at his expression] "Kidding! ...Mostly."
[Tom's blood runs cold as she winks. The way she says it—half-joking, half-deadly serious—makes him wonder just how many "annoying" humans have disappeared after crossing her. He swallows hard, suddenly very aware of how many times he's sassed her today.]
Alice: [noticing his silence, pokes him playfully] "Oh, relax! You're way too fun to eat." [grins, showing just a little too much teeth] "...Probably."
Alice leaned in closer, her golden eyes gleaming with dark amusement as she licked her lips. "You wanna hear something fun, Tommy?" Her voice dropped to a husky purr. "Sometimes, when I’m feeling playful, I’ll scoop up a whole handful of cows—just plop them right into my mouth—"
She mimed the motion with her fingers, popping an imaginary cluster of cattle past her lips before clamping her jaw shut with a thunderous CRUNCH. Her cheeks bulged exaggeratedly as she ground her teeth, the sound like boulders colliding.
"Mmmf—grind—crunch—ohhh, Tommy, you should see it!" she moaned around her imaginary mouthful, saliva dripping. "The flesh, the bones—everything just pulps! And the taste—!" She swallowed loudly, then sighed in bliss. "Nothing makes me feel more alive."
Tom stared, his stomach churning. "You need therapy. Like, yesterday."
Alice slammed her palm down beside him, making the earth quake as she burst into laughter. "Aww, what’s wrong? You a bleeding-heart vegan now?" She wiped a tear away, still giggling. "Ohhh, I should show you sometime! A whole dozen cows—snap, crunch, gone! Then you’d really understand—" She flexed her arms playfully. "—the might of your girlfriend~"
Tom grimaced, his face pale. "The thought alone makes me sick."
Alice’s laughter boomed again as she flung her head back, her mouth hanging wide open—a cavern of glistening teeth and coiled, muscular tongue. Then, with terrifying suddenness, she yanked him up to her face, her grin turning feral.
"Then watch closely, little man," she whispered—before clenching her jaw violently.
CRACK-CRUNCH-GRIND
Tom flinched, but couldn’t look away. The raw, colossal power on display was hypnotic—her teeth slamming together with enough force to powder stone, her tongue writhing like a living thing as it mushed imaginary remains against her palate. Spit flicked from her lips with every mock chew, some droplets hitting Tom directly.
Alice finally stopped, panting slightly, her pupils blown wide with adrenaline. "See? Easy."
Tom realized he’d been holding his breath.
Alice: (grinning down at Tom with predatory amusement) "Okay, seriously though—what's your deal, Tommy? Why are you still here? Most guys would be begging for mercy by now. Or sobbing. Or pissing themselves. But you? You just take it. What's wrong with you?"
Tom: (crossing his arms) "Oh, I dunno, maybe I just have a really bad case of Stockholm syndrome—"
Alice: (immediately cutting him off with a snort) "Nah, nah, see, Stockholm syndrome implies you were kidnapped against your will. But let's be real—you like this. You stay because you want to."
Tom: (opening his mouth to protest)
Alice: (plowing right over him) "And don't even try the whole 'I have no choice' thing. You literally climbed into my mouth once. Voluntarily. Like a snack with a death wish."
Tom: (throwing his hands up) "Okay, first of all—"
Alice: (mimicking him in a high-pitched voice) "'Okay, first of all—' SHUT UP, TOMMY. You know I could flick your head off like a bottle cap. Or roll over in my sleep and turn you into a stain. Or sneeze and send you into orbit. And yet—"* (leans in, grinning) "—here you are. Still talking back. Still sassing me. Why?"
Tom: (pausing, then smirking) "Maybe I just enjoy the abuse."
Alice: (cackling) "Ohhh, now we're getting somewhere! Maybe you're into being humiliated! Maybe you need a giant woman to put you in your place! Maybe—" (gasps dramatically) "—you're the one who's actually crazy and needs therapy!"*
Tom: (deadpan) "Wow. Profound."
Alice: (nodding sagely) "Mmmhmm. Textbook case of 'tiny man with a humiliation kink.' Should we get you a diagnosis? Maybe a prescription? 'Take two giantess-induced ego-crushings and call me in the morning'?"
Tom: (rolling his eyes) "Oh, sure, because you're the picture of mental stability."
Alice: (grinning) "Exactly! See? You get it. We're both unhinged. That's why this works." (pokes him, sending him tumbling) "Now shut up and accept your fate, tiny."
Alice: (looming over Tom, resting her chin on her palm) "You know what's hilarious? From up here, you look like a squeaky toy. A defective one."
Tom: (dusting himself off) "Wow, what a fresh insult. Really cutting."
Alice: (prodding him with her pinky, sending him stumbling) "Mommy's just stating facts, Tommy. You're barely a person. More like... a challenge mode for me."
Tom: (glaring up at her finger) "Oh good, I'm a minigame now—"
Alice: (interrupting with a grin) "A failing minigame. Watch this—" (flicks him lightly, sending him rolling) "Oops! High score!"
Tom: (groaning as he sits up) "You're really leaning into this 'mommy' thing, huh?"
Alice: (gasping, clutching her chest) "You noticed? Aww, does widdle Tommy like it?" (leans down, breath hot on him) "Should I make you say it?"
Tom: (shoving at her hovering nose—uselessly) "I'd rather get stepped on."
Alice: (snorting) "See? This is why you're fun. Most bugs screech when I tease them. You? You sass. It's adorable." (pokes his chest) "Like a hamster yelling at a hurricane."
Tom: (batting at her finger) "Can the hurricane shut up for five seconds—"
Alice: (abruptly looming, eyes dark) "Make me." (A beat. Then she cackles, blowing his hair back) "Oh wait—you can't! Because you're nothing. A speck. A crumb I haven't licked up yet."
Tom: (muttering) "And yet here you are, obsessed with your crumb."
Alice: (freezing. Then—) "OHHHH! SASS LEVEL UP!" (grabs him, dangling him by his shirt) "Mommy's so proud!" (licks him full-length like a popsicle)
Tom: (spitting out her saliva) "I hate you."
Alice: (grinning) "No, you don't~"
Alice loomed over Tom, her lips curling into a sadistic grin, her golden eyes gleaming with wicked amusement. Her laughter—sharp, unhinged, dripping with malice—echoed through the air like the cackle of a villain who’d already won.
"Ohhh, Tommy~" she purred, her voice a velvet-coated blade. "Did you really fall in love with a skyscraper? A living natural disaster?" She leaned in closer, her breath hot and mocking. "How pathetic is that?"
Tom opened his mouth to retort, but Alice cut him off, her grin widening as she poked him with a fingertip, sending him tumbling onto his back.
"Look at you," she sneered, tilting her head like a cat toying with its prey. "A speck. A crumb. A nothing." She flexed her arms, muscles rippling beneath her skin. "And me? I’m a goddess. A force of nature. I could sneeze and turn you into a red stain."
Tom scowled, pushing himself up. "Yeah, yeah, we get it. You’re big and scary—"
"And you," she interrupted, "are tiny and weak." She let out another dark chuckle, her tongue sliding across her teeth. "Face it, Tommy. You’re nothing compared to me. Just another insect under my heel."
Tom crossed his arms. "And yet, here you are, obsessed with your little ‘insect.’"
Alice’s grin twisted, her eyes flashing with something dangerous. "Oh, I’m not obsessed," she murmured, leaning in until her face filled his vision. "I’m just entertained."
She snapped her teeth inches from him, the sound like boulders colliding, before pulling back with a manic laugh.
"But hey—if you really love me that much, who am I to judge?" She winked. "Even ants dream of giants, I guess~"
Alice: (suddenly gasping with mock revelation, her grin turning wicked) "Ohhh, I almost forgot—we can't ignore your greatest achievement, can we? The time you crawled inside me like a desperate little worm~"*
Tom: (face burning) "Okay, first of all—"
Alice: (slamming a fingertip over his mouth, shushing him) "Ah-ah! The pathetic bug doesn’t get to talk yet. You stepped out of line with your backtalk earlier." (Her eyes gleamed with cruel amusement as she leaned in.) "Besides, what could you even say? ‘It was a tactical error’? ‘I regret everything’?" (She snorted.) "Please. You volunteered. Like a good little toy."*
Tom: (muffled against her finger, glaring) "Mmf—mph!"
Alice: (ignoring him, cackling) "And the best part? You probably liked it. Admit it—you’re already daydreaming about Round Two!" She threw her head back, howling with laughter, her entire body shaking. "Oh my god, this is too good! I should charge admission—‘Watch the Tiny Man Attempt Dignity’!"
Tom: (finally shoving her finger away, scowling) "You’re insufferable."*
Alice: (wiping away tears, still giggling) "And yet here you are. Still standing there. Still blushing. Still mine~"* (She booped his nose, sending him stumbling.) "Face it, Tommy—you lost the second you looked up and realized how fun it is to be small."*
Alice: (clutching her stomach, already wheezing before she even starts) "Ohhhh, Tommy—no, no, wait, I have to bring this up again—the way you just stood there drooling at my—pfft—at my entrance like a brainless goldfish!" She mimicked him, jaw slack, eyes crossed, a line of imaginary drool dangling from her lip. "I had to flick you just to get you moving! Hilarious!"
Tom: (grinding his teeth) "I was assessing the situation—"
Alice: (immediately cutting him off with a snort) "Assessing what? The quicksand of your own bad decisions?" She dissolved into giggles, slapping the ground hard enough to bounce him into the air. "And then—OH MY GOD—when you actually stepped inside and the walls clenched—" (She mimed a violent squeeze with her hands, complete with a wet squelch noise.) "Your face! Like you’d just realized you’d volunteered as tribute in the world’s dumbest horror movie!"
Tom: (crossing his arms, turning redder by the second) "You’re really milking this—"
Alice: (ignoring him, tears of laughter streaming down her cheeks) "AND THE CARESSING! Ohhh, Tommy, you idiot—" (She switched to a falsetto, batting her eyelashes.) "‘O-Oh, better be gentle—don’t wanna upset the kaiju-sized death-tunnel—’ HAH! As if your pathetic little fingers could’ve done anything but tickle!"
Tom: (muttering) "Worked well enough, apparently—"
Alice: (losing it even harder) "THAT’S THE BEST PART! You panicked like a chihuahua in a thunderstorm the second it actually worked! Scrambling for the exit like—nyoom!—" (She made a frantic sprinting motion with two fingers before screaming with laughter.) "And then! AND THEN! I had to fish you out like a soaked rat—dripping everywhere—OH MY GOD TOMMY YOU’RE UNBELIEVABLE!"
She collapsed onto her back, howling, kicking her legs like an overturned tortoise, her breath coming in ragged gasps between peals of laughter.
Tom: (deadpan) "Are you done?"
Alice: (wheezing, barely coherent) "Nope! Never! This is eternal ammo! I’m carving it on your tombstone!"